Exclusive Matchmaking - How to beat the (single) January blues

At Seventy Thirty, Exclusive Dating Agency, our team of international matchmakers discuss how you can overcome the January blues and get ourselves back on track for a successful 2015.

Clinical Psychologists[1] have suggested that increased mental activity, setting yourselves challenges, partaking in physical activities and increased social activity allow for better mental health during the January slump. These aspects can also be applied to your love life, to give it a kick start this New Year.

Mental Activity: Increase your mental activity by increasing your own emotional awareness and intelligence

Spend time today thinking and identifying your habits in your dating life: are you attracted to a ‘type’ of person? Are you the rescuer? Are you preventing yourself from meeting new people? Are you putting your professional life before your personal one?

Allowing yourself time to exercise your mind and think about your life objectively is the first step in creating positivity. Instead of thinking why these issues have occurred, focus on how you can make positive change to prevent them from continuing. This method of thinking will allow you to develop your own awareness, allowing you to make a mental plan for future goals and subsequently letting you feel better and in control.

Top Tip: It is easy for us to use avoidance as a coping mechanism and allowing yourself to think “it’s just a touch of the January blues”. However this is classed as verbalised avoidance, preventing you from moving into a more positive space and welcoming positive change.

Set yourself a Challenge: Giving yourself one realistic challenge allows you to set yourself up for success

Choose one thing in your personal life you would like to do. With only 8% of resolutions being upheld, keeping the challenge to a minimum improves the likeliness of success. This challenge could be to spend one Saturday clearing the clutter at home asking yourself what you really need in your life or it may be to approach one person to see if they might like a coffee with you.

Top Tip: Make small changes to your life which are achievable rather than making declarations of great change to avoid failure and falling into old habits. Once you have achieved your goal, move onto a new challenge.

Partaking in physical Activities: Being active allows you to clear your mind, promoting self-awareness and positivity

The release of endorphins from exercise triggers feelings of pleasure and happiness, so encouraging yourself to make the first step into engaging in physical activity will not go unrewarded.

Being active also allows you to expand your interests, allowing you to immerse yourself in new and interesting endeavours. Joining a new exercise club or encouraging yourself to try one new exercise you have not tried before, will allow you to meet new people which in turn encourages new social activity. Be open to allowing new social connections, encouraging to see people you find interesting away from your new group.

Increased Social Activity: To help beat those January blues increase your social activity which can additionally allow you to meet

When you have allowed yourself time to mentally understand the positive changes you would like to make, and have taken the time to engage in new and exciting psychical exercise, you will start to feel more inclination and enthusiasm to meet new people. Signing up to classes which will provide you with new interests, enrolling in activities such as photography group, wine groups, reading clubs, art exhibits etc., may catch your interest and allow you to meet likeminded people, widening your social circle and increasing your opportunity to smile and have fun. This will help you to ‘get out there’, meeting people and becoming used to interacting on a social level which can build your ability to interact on a romantic level.

Top Tip: Understand that taking your own love life into your own hands is vital and meeting new people.

It is absolutely normal to feel a little low after the high of the holidays. Having some down time is good to get refreshed, but don’t become engulfed in the slump - keep active, be positive and look forward to a great 2015.

 

[1] Watkins, E. University of Exeter: Mood Disorders Centre.