Psychologist Dr Georgina Barnett at Seventy Thirty says having a sexual totem is an amazingly simple way to connect with yourself on a sensual level. “This can be something like a sculpture of a sensual and beautiful woman, or an erotic picture or painting. The important thing is that this image or sculpture should instantly lift and inspire you to connect with your sexual self. You should be able to see yourself as that woman or in that scene. The purpose of the sexual totem is to act as a trigger to remind you to be your sexual self and to act in a self-expressive and sexually-affirming way.”

Place your totem somewhere you can easily and frequently see it and “focus on building a strong association between this and your experience as a sexual being”, Georgina says. “Whether or not you are in a relationship it’s important that your symbol is about you rather than yourself in relation to a partner so that you nurture this aspect of yourself for you.”

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